Transcending Ego

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This month: Transcending Ego

Our theme this month is about Transcending Ego — which I'm defining this way:

Moving from a contracted, protective focus of the self toward a more spacious way of being — one that is grounded in inherent worth and authentic living, while also embracing and leaning into connection with other people, the natural world, and sources of meaning that are larger than the self.

For me — and I suspect for most of us — that's a key ingredient in leading a life we can love — i.e., living our own definition of a Beautiful Life.

As I did last month, I've written a blog post that's based on some very personal journaling I did to explore this theme.

This time, it explores both sides of the question of ego...

You'll hear about times when I've gotten hooked by ego (and its sibling, shame) — and the trouble that has caused for me. And you'll also hear examples of times when I've left ego behind — and what the ingredients are that allowed me to do that.

The post goes deep into the paradoxes that are present within this territory — and the wisdom they point toward.

But here's where I ultimately landed with my learnings and takeaways:

If I want to live a life that I love, I need to find a way to get my ego out of the way as an obstacle. And doing that paradoxically involves both focusing on myself and forgetting about myself…

I think that’s true for all of us.

We need to regularly take time to listen to ourselves, to know ourselves. We need to notice and respond to our needs — not just for obvious things like sleep and food, but also for the other subtler things that nurture and renew us.

We need to refill our wells with those things that allow each of us to be a more “centered self” vs. being triggered into more and more “self-centered” responses as our wells run dry.

We need frequent pauses to get perspective, to see the bigger picture, to remember our common humanity and interconnectedness — and our inherent worthiness as human beings — so we can let go of reactive, constricting, limited ways of thinking, acting, and interacting. So we can stop trying to “earn” a sense of worthiness and instead simply enjoy living our lives.

And after these pauses — to look inward, to listen, to get perspective — we then need to turn our gaze elsewhere.

We need to actively pursue the kinds of experiences that allow us to forget ourselves and the compulsive things we think we “have to” do to be enough.

That might look like deep engagement in things that matter to us — times when we’re immersed in curiosity, creativity, conversation, and other “flow” experiences.

It might look like acts of connection and contemplation — with other people and the world around us. Nature, music, art, love, kindness, compassion.

And it might look like spiritual practices and perspectives that help us experience ourselves not as separate individuals but as part of a larger whole.

But here’s the bottom line…

All of this underscores how crucial it is — again and again — to create those spacious moments in which we can unhook from our reactive, ego-driven responses and choose the wiser ones that set us free.

As you dig into our offerings for this month, you'll notice that all of these ideas are echoed in our September journaling series. I hope you'll find that the chance to explore them for yourself indeed creates some openings for you into more spacious and satisfying ways of being...


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