Boundaries are essentially about what you say “yes” and “no” to.
People ask for your time, energy, attention — and you decide whether or not to share those most fundamental of resources.
Sometimes the decision is a conscious one. But sometimes it’s a “boiling a frog” scenario, where you don’t even realize how much you’ve given away until things have gone way too far.
Sometimes it’s a clear and enthusiastic yes — or a definitive no. But sometimes your gut says no and yet your head talks you into saying yes anyway. Or you agonize over the answer, with multiple conflicting yesses or noes making it hard to decide — and making the path of least resistance the default, whether or not it’s the best choice in the end.
Sometimes you say yes and then realize it was the wrong choice — yet don’t allow yourself to change your answer.
And sometimes no one asks you for anything. And yet you give anyway.
That can be a delight when it’s an authentic act of generosity and love. But when it’s prompted by internalized shoulds, by guilt, by a dysfunctional need for control, or by trying to somehow prove our value or “earn” others’ love and respect, it becomes a problem. It usually crosses an unspoken boundary — sacrificing your own goals and well-being for what you imagine others want, need, or expect of you.
Does your “yes” diminish you or enrich you?
That’s the crucial question. And it tells you where your boundaries lie.
So many of us struggle with the topic of boundaries — getting clear on them, trusting and honoring them, and knowing how to protect them.
And yet it’s a crucial ingredient in living your Beautiful Life.
So it seemed like an important topic for us to explore together inside Joybook.
As we dig into this theme together this month through journaling, learning, and conversation, we’ll explore both the inward and outward ways in which we can better recognize and honor our boundaries — and our own beautiful, imperfect, authentic, and oh so human selves.